Self-compassion is being nice to yourself when things don’t go as planned. While mentally healthy adults need to practice self-compassion, it’s equally important that kids learn this skill as early as possible. Teaching your child how to treat themselves with the same kindness that they would a close friend can lead to better coping skills, compassion for others, and a reduction in depression and anxiety.
Below are some of the most effective ways to instill self-compassion in children so they will have a stronger foundation for emotional and mental health.
Let Your Child Express Strong Feelings
Strong feelings and emotional reactions are a part of growing up. Allowing your child to articulate their emotions, even difficult ones like anger, sadness, frustration, and fear, can help them develop self-compassion. Instead of shutting down your child or minimizing their feelings, let them know that all emotions are okay and guide them in healthily expressing them.
Practice What You Preach
Even if it sometimes doesn’t seem like it, children are constantly watching their parents and modeling their behavior. Be sure to model self-compassion by speaking kindly about yourself, recognizing your mistakes, and forgiving yourself. Your kid will likely notice how you treat yourself and follow your example.
If you struggle with self-compassion, depression, or anxiety, mental health treatment in Ohio is readily available so that you can get the help you need.
Challenge Catastrophic Thinking
When your child doesn’t get something after working hard for it, they may regard themselves as failures. You can challenge this catastrophic thinking by showing them evidence that dispels their feelings of unworthiness.
This can be accomplished by showing your child successful people who have experienced similar setbacks, and how they overcame those obstacles in the end.
Implement Family Routines
Consistent daily routines will help create a sense of safety and security for children. Daily rituals such as family meals, reading before bed, and designated playtime with Mom or Dad will demonstrate that they are worthy of care. Kids who know they are worthy of care are more likely to be more self-compassionate.
Praise Your Kid
Provide frequent praise and encouragement for effort instead of results. Parents who are overly critical of their kids for less-than-ideal outcomes will make it harder for their children to trust themselves and more hesitant to take on future challenges.
Saying things like, “I appreciate how hard you worked on that assignment,” will show your child that their hard work matters.
Encourage Your Child’s Interests
Support your child in pursuing their unique interests and passions, and let them explore activities and hobbies that bring them joy and fulfillment, even if the activity is not something you enjoy. Encouragement will help your little one develop their inherent skills and feel pride in their work.
Practice Forgiveness
Children will mess up or make a mistake at some point. As a parent, it’s best to respond with patience, understanding, and forgiveness. Help your kid learn from their mistakes while stressing that they are still loved unconditionally. If your child knows that mishaps are just a part of life, they will learn not to be overly critical of themselves when things don’t go as planned.
Teach Different Perspectives
Guide your child in seeing situations from multiple points of view. For example, if they’re struggling with something, ask them how they would treat a friend in a similar situation, then ask them to use the same kind of sentiments toward himself or herself.
Prompting them to consider how others might think or feel can build empathy and compassion for themselves and others.
Implementing the tips listed above can instill self-acceptance and resilience in children, and prepare them for life’s challenges and disappointments. By teaching the vital skill of self-compassion, we can equip our kids to become more compassionate adults.”
Article written by Kent Reason. Kent is an editor and content specialist with Ohio Recovery Center, a substance use treatment center located in Van Wert, OH. ORC offers an array of services for addiction and mental health, including multiple levels of care and evidence-based treatment options.